RETRO.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Losing the wit, and mind.

I was doing some administration work in the office yesterday and had then realised how sluggish my handwriting had got. Its the kind where people would think you were writing with a pen and then your blood the next. Well here's how I see it. If we start ignoring the little things we do in life then there's really no point in aiming for any big things in life. Just like your highness's handwriting. If i cannot even bear to write properly for five minutes, how would i expect myself to hence be determined enough to study in the future.
Then again, its fun to just aim for really impossible things in life so when you achieve something somewhat near the scope of your dreams, i guess you would really feel happiness.

I shall start things off then:
1) Pick up any musical instrument and become an instant protege', so i can escape to France from army and come back fourty years later declaring that i have suffered enough without being able to see my family members ( of course, admist disregarding totally the vast technologies of webcams, telephones and real possible harry potter owls that will help deliver my mail. )

2) Aim to be 2006's man of the year... with the sexiest adam's apple. It seems ridiculous that those frig magazines dont take notice of Asians. I mean, though mine seems to be more of a adam's peanut, Its still sexy.

3) Washboard abs will drive the world mad once more and Im getting them. In fact, im going all out with the secret manaul that reads "Get a ten pack and still not look like a freak." I will get it from a uncle who also sidelines as a tissue paper seller somewhere somehow with my life savings because i saw it from Kungfu Hustle and i know it can be done. If cannot find, will somehow try to decipher from another manual, "help your wife do the laundry lah!" at all non-major bookstores.

4) Magazines are quoting that britney spear's perfume 'curious', though was curiously bad, was still one of the top selling perfumes in America. It seems like a easy industry to tap into then. 2006 will see me releasing scents that cater to people specifically. 'Belacan Chili' and 'Durian' for Singaporeans who not only cannot live without their delicacies, but must smell like them too. Also, 'Wo De Ah Ma!!!' ('My grandmother!!!') for other chinese counterparts who miss their deceased so much.

5) Finding all the monkeys in the world to be scratched by them, so that i may ultimately become immuine to the Aids virus and then save the world. First though, i will find a mental institution to sponsor me.

6) Become as popular as xiaxue (in the wrong way) by creating dissent among the public that its not only okay to use the handicap toilets, it is alright to kick the handicap too. This way, The straits times would be stupid enough to name me influential news worthy of 2006 just as it was to name her for 2005.

7) Become Singapore Idol just so that i can finally meet Taufik and tell him that i know his cousin when the other way around is a million times easier.

8) Become super handsome. Without the plastic surgery.

All that aside, i show the champions in my heart for 2005.

Venus Winning Wimbledon again.

David Nalbandian winning his first major title by beating, yes, Roger Federer.

Written fashion may not be history @7:47 PM